As many of you may know, I’m on the launch team for Katie Davis Majors’ new book, Daring to Hope: Finding God’s Goodness in the Broken and the Beautiful, that comes out October 3rd. I loved Kisses from Katie, so when I heard about this opportunity, I jumped on it. I spent the first 12 years of my life as a missionary kid, so Africa is my heart’s home.
This book couldn’t have come at a better time. Almost a year ago, my life changed drastically. I was in a car accident and almost died. Due to a brain injury, my life will never be the same. I wrestled a lot with God about His goodness and will. There are times where I didn’t see much good only hard things. Katie Davis Majors wrestles with many of the same questions swirling around in my brain.
Is God really good? Does He really love us? What do you do when God doesn’t show up in the way that you asked Him to?
These are questions that plague me.
I wrestle with God, like Jacob with the angel. I pound my fists against His chest, crying “Why me? Why does everyone else’s life seem like they’re falling into place and mine looks like a mess? Why am I suffering, I have been a good person?” When I’m in the pits of despair, I wonder if God sees me. If He sees, how hard I am working. How much courage, just getting through the day, is taking? I grieve for who I was and the dreams I had. I wonder if God is even there.
Oftentimes, in the dry, hard places, when we don’t have a clue what God is doing, or even if He is there, He is drawing us to Himself the way He always intended.
“As I gazed at the rainbow, God whispered to me a deep truth. There is so much beauty to be found in a wound that is healed, in an unlikely friendship that is forged. There is much beauty to be found when the one we have nursed for hours and prayed for many more is healed and restored, or when the child we have faithfully advised and prayed for turns back to the Truth or any other happy ending. But there is also beauty to be found in sitting and praying by the bedside of an ill friend and holding her hand just before she slips away and looks into the face of Jesus. There is beauty to be found in the desperate and many-times-repeated unanswered prayers that have time and again ushered us to His feet. There is beauty to be found in a life poured out in faithfulness and obedience, no matter the circumstance. There is beauty to be found in the unlikely places, but in so many cases, we must be facing the storm to see it. Often, to behold this beauty, to be reminded of God’s promises in such a tangible way, we must turn toward, not away from, the darkness.” Katie Davis Majors
This book has wrecked my ideas of God and brokenness. Sometimes, God chooses not to answer our prayers the way we want. It’s hard to trust God. It’s even harder to trust in His perfect timing. We often want what we want right now.
Often, He meets us in our mess and even in our doubts and says wait. It takes a lot of bravery to hope that God will say yes, but He might say no. It’s okay to be broken. This world is messy. Tragedy happens, unspeakable things occur, hearts break, but God’s not done with us yet.
“He uses the bending and the breaking and the dying to prepare the harvest, to prepare more for us. We reach high to the Son and He comes down and pulls us closer. We lift our heads to Him in awe and we know that there might be hard the corner but we can look expectantly even to the bowing and the breaking, even the death of all we have planned, because we know in Him there will always be more” Katie Davis Majors
So we dare to hope because God has shown His faithfulness. We see God’s provision. He hears our cries. He weeps for us and our suffering. He walks beside us in the midst of hardships. We dare to hope because He is still on the throne.